a less important thread than viper's

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by JohnJohnJohnson, Oct 15, 2008.

  1. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Emily and I went out to a club.

    This FR is full of fail. I am posting it for posterity and because I am pleasantly self-involved. I approached 3 girls, here is how it went.

    Approach #1. HB7 blonde with a hot body - and two dudes.

    I was doing count-downs in my head. I had just watched Tim's material.

    "5 .. 4 ... 3. 2... 1&a1/2 ..... 1, go! Ok now go. Just kidding, NOW go."

    I did about 3 of these.

    Nope. Still no go.

    I kept telling myself to make a move. (Go go go.. OK now. Go... approach, go now.) Why did it feel like I was in MORTAL PERIL? MASSIVE internal resistance. Still dancing in place the whole time. Heart racing.

    It got worse. I began to think, "Shit, I'm in my head now!" I thought, "I need to be in state, I need to feel the WOO. Shit!!! I'm not feeling the WOO."

    Then I thought, "That's JUST the kind of thought I need to STOP thinking. Override- Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!"

    I did something self-amusing to loosen up but it came out half-assed and made things worse.

    Then "Shit, thinking about my thoughts while at a club! That's even worse!"

    "WOW I'm SO IN MY HEAD, SHIT! GET OUT!"

    I remembered Tim's advice about pick-up being a MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL experience. I thought, "She will be happy to be dancing with a cool dude." I was as geared up as I was going to get. I could see myself approaching, I could see the happy look she would have as I finally came over. So I moved towards her, said, "Hi," ... she smiled in the first instant but then she changed her expression and said "umm... hi..." with "WHATEVER" tonality. I perservered and just ignored it and smiled and came up to dance with her.

    To get rid of me she pointed to a friend who wasn't her boyfriend and said he was her boyfriend. I knew it was a lie but I wasn't going to push her to dance with me if she wasn't into it. I said "my bad, no disrespect," and left...

    #2. After all the build-up followed by the blatant rejection, I was in a WORSE state than I had started out, which was an accomplishment of its own.

    I went downstairs to find my friends. My best friend there said "hot girl behind you," I looked, it was true. HB8, she was cute and very sexy.

    Again, I told myself to approach. Approach approach approoooh shit, too late, some guy is dancing with her.

    But then he ejected... But then he came back... <snip> 10 minutes and a few countdowns later i went up to her. She was so CUTE!!! She backed away a little bit but not in a rejection way, just in a "I'm smaller than you, I am backing away," way. Ha ha, adorable. We smile at each other, then I realize she looks kind of young, I teased, "Tell me you're not sixteen."

    "I am," she says.

    Suuuure. "That's good, cuz I'm 15," I said. (I'm 23.) We danced a little closer. "Wait," I added. "Are you serious?"

    She nodded, bashfully.

    I told her, "You will be hot in 2 years! :)" and left. I have no idea if she was telling the truth.

    #3. The third girl was fucking BEAUTIFUL. GORGEOUS half-black girl with beautiful big breasts and a pretty face, not as beautiful as my wife but I've realized it's ridiculous to compare people physically to someone you're in love with. I danced towards her, she looked askance for a second, then she made a condescending smile AS IF to say, "Alright... alright whiteboy, we can do this..." (Um, thanks!) We danced for a bit, she kept cutezoning me, giving me that smile like, "ha ha, alright, we can do this, that's cute." I tried to break that frame a little bit by pushing her playfully and telling her to stop smiling while moving closer to her, but we couldn't really hear each other on the dance floor... I realized I was kind of floundering in spite of all this RIDICULOUS HOTNESS so I escalated a bit, spun her away, spun her back, let her go, pulled her in... Do any other white guys have this issue of getting "cutezoned" by black girls? Eventually she said "Thank you," as in, "Cute dance, let's split up now." We split up.
     
  2. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    :rofl: Nice thread title.

    Just curious, but why are you focused on making approaches now that you are married?
     
  3. Horror

    Horror Guest

    Is this your experience? Keep your head up. One thing I realized is that you have to go up smiling, confident, look like you're having a good time, but don't look overly-energetic. Smile, but don't scream. Talk, but don't babble. Flirt, but be reserved.

    Finding a partner is part luck, part numbers.

    EDIT: Married? What?
     
  4. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I'm not in a closed or structured LTR with Emily. The short of it is that the process of getting laid is vital to a man. You can see when a guy has been out of the game for a while. You can tell with ease. I don't want to be like that. I want to be The Best! Lolz. No but I want to be the best me I can be, for me, for Emily, period.

    We've set up a possibly habitual engagement where we go out Saturday night and stay in alllllllll of Sunday doing nothing - but each other :naughty: :bowdown: :o
     
  5. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    I dunno, I'm just confused as to why you'd get married but still be in an open relationship. If you want an open relationship, I would think that marriage would be the last thing on your mind.

    I like the idea of open relationships, btw. I just don't see how marriage fits in the picture.

    And I also have to wonder if all the energy that is being put into making approaches might best be served by putting it into your marriage.

    To me, the idea of "marriage" seems like a closed-end, monogamous relationship. :dunno:
     
  6. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    confer my thread, "Emily and I are getting married."

    marriage to me was a combination of
    - convenience
    - the illusion of eternity merited, warranted, required, enjoyed a celebration, i.e. a wedding
     
  7. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    Fair enough. If it works, that's all that matters.

    As for the approaches, burrrrrrn. :rofl:
     
  8. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Ugh.

    You're right my broseph.

    Very bad.
     
  9. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Thanks for the encouragement!

    Success for me is a matter of consistency... the issue is not one approach or even one night, rather, it's persistence
     
  10. scottmcl

    scottmcl New Member

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    I can feel the awkward...

    its all to familiar.

    What the hell do you say to a girl at a club when the music is unbelievably loud? I just don't understand how to meet people at clubs???
     
  11. i saw nothing wrong w. your approaches. dating/flirting is like baseball, no matter how good you are you will still strike out a lot.


    its all about persistence. meeting the right girl at the right moment. hell depending on her mood/how her day has gone the same exact approach can work one day and fail the next.


    ive dated a few black girls (im white).... but you are correct, most of the times you get cutezoned. its like they find you attractive but bc you are white its more of a "hey look at the cute white guy".
     
  12. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    :bowdown:

    thank you.

    that's what i'm talking about.

    i'll be on the lookout for it next time though.

    edit: i wonder if you have to be more direct about it than usual cuz of cultural differences.
     
  13. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Alaya,

    There is no single, unifying, PUA canon*.

    I take what I think makes sense - or makes sense for me based on my personality - and mix it into a stew and go from there.

    But before I even get that far I have to get comfortable approaching again and staying in the interaction without having a heart attack. So that's where I'm at right now.

    *canon; a body of rules, principles, or standards accepted as axiomatic and universally binding in a field of study or art: the neoclassical canon.
     
  14. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    nobody knows that word except me
     
  15. Alaya

    Alaya Active Member

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    I just know it because I went to religious school :dunno:
     
  16. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    :rofl: I get cutezoned by my black girlfriends.
     
  17. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I do comp religion classes a lot, I know what it is :eek3:
     
  18. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    What club were you at? 16 year olds? :ugh:
    Long (and absolutely hilarious) story short: we (me and 6 friends, 1 of whom was asian, the rest white, and my ex gf who was desi) ended up in a black club in Chicago, with free VIP treatment and a VIP table (that right there was already a "needle off the record" moment... "what da fuck these crackas is doin' wit a VIP table in aw club yo?" :rofl: ) Anyway, one of my friends was all into black chicks at the time and he got fucking excited. The only way I can describe it would be like a little kid on xmas morning. He's like "I'm gonna go dance with a black chick! I'm gonna go dance with a black chick!!! :run: :nikko: " So he and my ex go out to the dance floor (I stayed at our table to drink our comped bottle of Patron silver), and he's getting down, and these two black chicks come up to my ex and go "izzat yo man?" She's like "nope." And then they both start dancing with him. So it was going pretty well for him. Was he cutezoned? Yeah, probably. I don't think they would have gone home with him. But when he came back to our table, he was like "I danced with two black chicks!!! :big grin: :big grin: :bigthumb: :nikko: :run: :wiggle: :noes: :nikko:"


    I've never been cutezoned cuz I've never been sexually attracted to a black woman so I've never even tried, but yes, I have seen it happen. Did you make up that word? I'm going to steal it.


    Seriously tho it was fucking ghetto and I was glad when we left :ugh:
    We got metal detected and frisked for weapons at the door :ugh: , and in the club you can't have bottles because bottles are weapons :ugh: , so whatever beer you order gets poured into a plastic cup :ugh:
    Except they let us have glasses for our comped bottle of Patron. It was hilarious. Imagine a bunch of white people, an asian, and a desi chick all dressed up in a club where everyone else is black (I mean like gangsta black, not intellectual black), and they have comped VIP treatment :rofl: My friend had just opened an account for the owner's business so that's why we got VIP treatment. Weird place, tho. Despite being ghetto, it was fucking expensive. $20 just to get in (unless you're VIP like us :bowrofl: )


    IBeveryone goes "$20 to get in a club is nothing you cheapass." This was like 3 years ago. But still. And fuck you, $20 is a lot of money to pay to get into a club.
     
  19. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    dude you know you can't hesitate that much and have any chance
     
  20. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    logically you can make yourself observe the 3 second rule by rationalizing that you will still approach anyway after hesitating (which you did), so you might as well go in right away and have a much better chance

    hesitation = masturbation
     
  21. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    LOL at number 2
     

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