A friend may want more with me

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Mugen92GS-R, Dec 17, 2007.

  1. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    Hey vag... lately i've been finding myself on the answering side of things here in the vag, but I have a new situation that I may need your help with.

    I'm in a very healthy / happy relationship, IMO... the best relationship I've ever been in. I also have a very good friend who's a girl. Mind you, I would NEVER cheat on my GF with this girl or anyone else for that matter.

    Anyways, we're (me, my good friend and some of her friends) are at a party tonight and she gets super wasted. Long story short, she basically tells me point blank that she wish I didn't have a girlfriend because she wanted to fuck me. Now... we always joke with eachother saying "i love you!" because we have an awesome friendship, and I really do love her as a friend, but she was really getting too 'fresh' with me tonight. It's not the first time she's gotten that way, and it's always and ONLY when she's drunk and always 'in line', but I kinda had to push her away a few times which is more than the norm.

    Anyways, I love this girl to death, and shes one of my best friends in the world. I don't want to be too harsh to her if I don't have to be... but tonights behavior honestly can not be tolerated.

    I would NEVER cheat on my girlfriend, and I know my friend knows this, but how can I tell her point blank, no strings attached that last night's behavior is unacceptable without sounding like an ass?

    Thanks Vag...
     
  2. mrchina

    mrchina Guest

    I can't believe I have to say this, but way to be a stand up guy and be true to your relationship

    Second, I'd basically tell her what you posted above. You value your friendship however it's just that. You love your girlfriend and you're in it for the long run. What happened last night can't happen again.
     
  3. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

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    I think you're reading too far into things.

    Also, I think suggesting that he stop hanging out and getting drunk with his friend is a little over the top.

    Mugen - Next time you see her I'd bring it up with her and me personally, I'd probably use a joke of somesort, or anything really, that makes me come off half serious/half joking. That way you don't come off sounding like an ass.

    If the problem persists after that, I'd re-evaluate the situation and go from there.
     
  4. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    :rofl: Wow, you obviously woke up on the wrong side of your swinging pendulum today.


    To the OP just tell her there is no chance, a lot of the time it takes head on rejection to start getting over what you already knew you couldn't have.
     
  5. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    You weren't being harsh, you were being retarded. Trying to convince the poster that he was fooling himself and actually does want to sleep with his friend.

    A. He said he didn't
    B. Who cares if he did, he knows it isn't going to happen
    C. That wasn't what he asked

    You just ramble on about how he is fooling himself and possibly wants to cheat. Where is the advice in that?
     
  6. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    OP just ignore Vipers posts in this thread. Keep hanging out with your best friend, and continue to party. But you do need to sit her down and just say something like "You are on of my best friends, and I don't know if this is warented or not but I just think I need to say I am very happy with <insert your gfs name>. And nothing could come between that. And while I'm saying this I would also like to say that I consider you nothing more then a friend, I really care about you yada yada yada.... but only as a best friend"... obviously not those words, cause that was kinda lame :o but something to that extent. It doesn't have to be a long conversation (probably best not to be). Just say your thing, give her a hug, and move on.

    She'll get over it, you don't need to start altering plans or events based around the fact that Viper thinks you are a weak person who will cheat on your girlfriend if you keep drinking around your best friend.
     
  7. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    Thanks so far for the replies.

    Viper, I can see where you would be skeptical, but I would seriously never cheat on my girlfriend, she means way too much to me for any one drunken night thing to fuck that up for. And I love my friend to death, but I'm not physically attracted to her, and even if I WAS single, I wouldn't have sex with her. Not that she's ugly, I just don't feel that way about her.

    The next time we hang out I think I'm just gonna joke around with her a little bit about what happened, but also let her know I'd never cheat on my girlfriend, and let her know she was getting a little too close to the line for my comfort the other night.

    Now I know why girls get all weird when their good guy friends start hitting on them :o
     
  8. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    If you do it in a joking manor it won't end the problem.
     
  9. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

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    Not necessarily.
     
  10. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    I didn't say I was going to joke around while telling her it can't be tolerated, I just said I was going to joke with her about what happened some, and THEN tell her that it can't happen again, while being serious.
     
  11. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Obviously, I'm not going to pull a Viper and use blanket statements and say they are fact. But joking about it has a chance to put an end to it, but also has a chance to allow it to continue. Sitting her down and just telling her what is up has a higher probability to nip it in the bud. I mean this is a girl, girls are easy to have these types of conversations with since this is the type of shit they live for, plus the OP is really close with her which would make the conversation that much easier to have.

    IMO saying with absolute certainty that IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN has a better chance of bringing that person into reality then joking about it, since joking about it might leave even the tiniest window of hope open. And that stupid little window is all a lot of people need to keep unwanted feelings alive.
     
  12. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Goodman, and good luck
     
  13. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    :squint:

    I don't assert my statements as fact. I use blanket statements a lot under the assumption that everybody knows that it doesn't apply to every situation. I assume that most people aren't stupid and realize this on their own without having to clarify everytime that not EVERYBODY follows the patterns of advice I give nor is my advice always on target. :dunno:
     
  14. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Careful. The way you reject her may increase her attraction for you.
     
  15. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I wasn't trying to derail this thread with that comment. But you do usually follow up a blanket statement saying that it is absolutly true. Hell you have a post in another thread right now from today that what you used to back it up was that it is absolutly true. Because in your reality something only worked one way, and therefore the blanket statement has to apply to everyones reality.
     
  16. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Personally I wish there was a way we could find out how many relationships ended prematurely or foolishly because of the Vag (the ones that did take advice) :rofl:
     
  17. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    :rofl: Seriously! :rofl:

    Someone could be like "my girlfriend didn't call me last night when she said she would... wtf!"

    Everyones response: DUMP THE HO!@!!11one!
     
  18. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    :rofl:

    I try not to tell people to end it, but Jesus, most of the time that IS the best advice for some of these relationships. Most of the time a thread pops up here because the relationship is so mangled beyond manageable that the only recourse is to bail.

    A blanket statement for ya. :mamoru:
     
  19. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    :rofl: Wow! That would actually be a funny experiment. I'm almost tempted to be the guinie pig to... although I really wouldn't want to fuck over some girl like that (as in me not being myself, or acting on my own thoughts/views).


    :bigthumb:
     
  20. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    But this is OT and would get out of hand and result in me getting slapped/kneed in the groin for saying/doing what I was told :wtc:
     
  21. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    "Now... tell her your friends DeShawn, Deandre, Damian and Tone want to join you in bed...yes... yes...."
     

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