2nd Date...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Guz200sx, Feb 6, 2007.

  1. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    So I'm going to visit this girl this weekend in PA. I am staying over at her house and we'll be sleeping in the same bed. Its only our 2nd time seeing each other but we talk everyday via one form of communication of another. I am pretty sure she is way into me. She's pretty much told her best friend and her sister about me already.

    I am wondering though about making the 1st move on her...Since we'll be sleeping in the same bed, It seems obvious that I should make a move...Whether I get shot down or not, depends on how the day/night goes. We'll be going out and having dinner with her sister and sisters husband then going to a restaruant/bar to see a local music band.

    Should I make the move after the dinner/show and at her house in bed??

    Or Should I make the move after dinner/during the show?? I'm sure the opportunity of dancing during the show will come up....
    I know this type of thing is of the moment but sometimes that stuff just goes by so if I miss the moment I can always capitalize later...and missing the moment may make her wonder if I'm going to kiss her or not...
     
  2. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    110,608
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Maryland
    make the move whenever you have the chance

    depends on what kind of move you're talking about though

    if it's sex, in the bed at night of course :mamoru:
    if it's a kiss or some other touchy feely stuff, you can do it while dancing i suppose

    but when you get back to her place that seems like a logical place to make any type of move
     
  3. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    Will I lose my chance at being intimate with her if I don't make a move and just end up cuddling??

    EDIT: I don't wanna come off as being too aggressive or as being a wuss.
     
    Last edited: Feb 6, 2007
  4. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    Yea...I think for a kiss I could try while dancing, depending on the song, of course...

    I'm guessing it'll just be whenever the moment is right, i guess...


     
  5. Amanda Ann

    Amanda Ann New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2007
    Messages:
    14,024
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    FL
    That could go either way. Sometimes just cuddling will lead to just cuddling and watching a movie. But sometimes cuddling is a smooth transition into getting all touchy. To be honest, alot of times it's a better transition than just putting the moves on her out of the blue. In my opinion, go for the flirty touching, even kissing at the bar, then see where that leads once you get back to your place. I'm pretty sure she's into you. She wouldn't invite you up to PA is she wasn't.
     
  6. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    Yea, I'm pretty sure she is into me too. But I don't know if she is THAT into me to take it to the next step. Intimately I mean.
    I know she has said she wants to wait to make it an "official" relationship.




     
  7. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2005
    Messages:
    110,608
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Maryland
    you may....she may want to be intimate with you or at least see how you make your move

    i don't think you will come off as to aggressive if you start light and if she reciprocates, then you have the "ok" to proceed :bigthumb:
     
  8. crazy15

    crazy15 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2005
    Messages:
    2,897
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    YAY AREA & UCSB
    seems pretty obvious you should make a move in the bed. i mean, what does she expect to happen haha. at minimum.
     
  9. tominos

    tominos New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2004
    Messages:
    897
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Portland, Oregon
    i think you have the green light, she invites you over to another state, she wants to make it official. go for it.
     
  10. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,467
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    the streets
    Couple of things:

    There must be a big hug the moment you come into contact with her. Do not hesitate.

    If her body language indicates that she is receptive, go ahead and kiss her while you are embracing.

    This will set the tone from the outset, whereas if you wait later to initiate contact, it may be awkward and she may not be as open to it.

    She will most likely be very excited from the anticipation and you should strike right away while the iron is hot. If she turns away at the end of the hug then obviously don't try to kiss her. But if her face is upturned towards yours and she is smiling and excited, you can go in for the kiss right then.
     
  11. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    :cool: This is great advice that I can try when I see her.

    I'll be driving up to her place so most likely we will be alone when I get their and I'll definately go for the big hug when I see her. I'll use your advice and see how the hug goes. I'm pretty sure she will be very receptive to the hug and prolly even the kiss.


     
  12. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    So i'll make my move when I first see her - give her a big hug then a kiss.

    Progress it through the night (w/ light touches & making another move if/when we dance) and at the end of the night, we'll see how it goes.

     
  13. LordOvenMitt

    LordOvenMitt New Member

    Joined:
    May 3, 2006
    Messages:
    129
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Georgia
    Make a move while dancing etc. Play it by how she reacts. And it bed at night, definately try to kiss her, and let her advance it. Work off of her signals and you will be fine.
     
  14. guiltybystand3r

    guiltybystand3r On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for e

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2006
    Messages:
    2,666
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tampa
    :werd:
     
  15. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

    Joined:
    May 29, 2000
    Messages:
    49,189
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    :uh: Not true at all. I hate when guys think like this. If you've been on a date with her and she likes you and you're staying at her place then of course she's gonna have you sleep in the bed with her. Asking you to sleep on the couch would be pretty weird. You can sleep in the same bed without having sex. If she wants to have sex then she'll let you know another way.
     
  16. crazy15

    crazy15 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2005
    Messages:
    2,897
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    YAY AREA & UCSB
    LIES! but its true, it does bring back a memory of when a girl i had just recently started dating, slept in my bed and i didnt make a move on her. she said the next day i scored points for being unpredicatble, because she thought id be like every other guy and try and make a move on her.
     
  17. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    We discussed this the other day too actually. She asked me if I had a problem sleeping in the same bed. I said no. She also asked me what I thought about "being together" and if it was too soon for us. I told her what she wanted to hear and said I didn't think it was too soon but I wanted her to be ready so we didn't have to do anything unless she was ready.
    She said I was great & sweet and if I was ok with snuggling.


    I meet a different girl one other time and we stayed in a hotel and I made a move and after the weekend together she wrote me a long ass email telling me she felt uncomfortable with everything i tried. :ugh: BUT she still wanted to see me again and even wanted to come to stay at my place for a weekend. It never came to fruitation though.

    So far, i've done the opposite of "every other guy" so falling into that category would suck. I like this girl and hopefully more can come for this.
    We'll see....I'm about to leave for the trip. WISH ME LUCK!!!
     
  18. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2002
    Messages:
    15,741
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wellington, Florida Bitches!
    UPDATE on 2nd date

    So I went to see her and we had a good time.

    When I met her at her apartment, we had a hug and she accepted my kiss, which we did twice. After talking some and getting settled in, I made my first move and surpised her by catching her with a kiss after she turned around from what she was doing. She liked in and we made out a little bit. Then while we sat and watched a movie, I made another move and kissed her again. We made out some more and forgot about the movie for a bit.

    Fast foward to the middle of the day, she said she was tired so we went and laid for a bit and we also made out for a bit while we laid in the bed. I think it was during this time that I was just staring into her eyes and she asked me what was i thinking, and I said i'm thinking about makin my move, lol, she smiled and said she wanted to take it slow. So we kissed some more and she said we should stop because it was getting too hard to keep going and she waited to wait and wasn't ready yet. So we just laid in the bed and she eventually fell asleep as did I.

    While at the bar, later that night, we kissed while dancing.

    Later that night, after getting back from hanging out at the bar, we kissed some more again but she was tired and went to sleep.

    I was a little disappointed and definately had the ol' blue ball thing going on. :rofl: But I knew going in that she was going to maybe want to wait.

    But something interesting I saw was that while on MYSPACE at her house, I checked out some of her friends and saw one of them was her cousin and she commented to him that she thinks she meet the man that she could spend the rest of her life with.
    So I asked her about that and she said yes it was me and that I wasn't supposed to see that! I told her it was public so everyone could see it. But I was happy that she had those type of feelings for me. She just said she wants to take it slow, Which we will.
     
  19. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,467
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    the streets
    Good job!

    I see a couple of small things that you could have done differently, but I'm not going to beat you up over them, and I'm sure you could figure out what they are.

    You did exactly what you set out to do: you escalated physically by kissing and making out with her.

    Your mission next time is to escalate further. So you can't be content next time with kissing. Remember, things work best when you escalate the relationship physically and she escalates it emotionally.

    She obviously enjoys kissing and making out with you. So if you make your move beyond kissing and she is resistant, don't make out with her for a time. The making out is her reward and if she isn't going along with what you want, you should punish her by not giving her what she wants.
     
  20. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

    Joined:
    May 29, 2000
    Messages:
    49,189
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    So you want to punish her for not being slutty? :ugh: This was only their 2nd date!

    If you want a relationship with this girl then you should act like you are worth being her bf and not try to move so fast. You'll have plenty of time to deal with all the sex stuff later, try just getting to know her first. It is a big turnoff when a guy tries to have sex too soon.
     
  21. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,467
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    the streets
    You obviously misunderstood.

    By escalate, I mean move beyond kissing. I don't care how far past kissing it goes, but it has to go farther. I'm not telling him to rape her.

    Like I said before, he needs to escalate physically and she needs to escalate emotionally.

    And a woman's opinion will never change the fact that the basis of a relationship is sexual. Its the reason men and women get together: to have sex and make babies (biologically speaking, at least).

    This will be the third date, so I think some sexual contact is in order.
     
  22. huntz0r

    huntz0r New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2005
    Messages:
    15,951
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Charlotte, NC
    Not initiating makeout sessions is moving slow, not fast. That is why it works.

    I don't agree with the school of thought that you have to get the vag nownownow or you lose your chance. If she kisses and touches you (not dirty just in general), that is enough. If she actually likes you then she will only wait so long before pouncing ;) However, I don't see the point in sleeping in a girl's bed and not trying to have sex with her. If she is having you sleep in her bed, she is sending a signal for sex whether or not she means to (or will admit it). If you aren't having sex then sleep on the couch, stay with a friend, or get a motel room. As it is, he's in limbo.

    Of course, if you are after "seduction" then the plan changes, because you are trying to get sex regardless of whether she likes you. But I don't think that's what is supposed to be going on here.
     
  23. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

    Joined:
    May 29, 2000
    Messages:
    49,189
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    Stuff like this is why I hate dating. 3 dates is nothing, you are still getting to know each other. I hate how guys are in such a rush to jump pass kissing. Take your time, what's the rush?
     
  24. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

    Joined:
    May 29, 2000
    Messages:
    49,189
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    San Diego, CA
    Not true at all. Mature adults can sleep in the same bed without having sex, it's not that hard. I've done it many times. Asking someone you are dating to sleep on the couch is silly and kind of rude.
     
  25. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 5, 2002
    Messages:
    57,467
    Likes Received:
    8
    Location:
    the streets
    The sexual chemistry is either there right away, or its not.

    You ask me whats the rush and I ask you what are you waiting for?

    If she doesn't want to fuck him by the third date she's not going to want to fuck him by the tenth.
     

Share This Page